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"Hmph!" - Chet Steadman



I've made a whole bunch of Chet Steadman noises at work today, mostly to get myself through constant frustration.

Hi, I'm Pizza Apple Banana

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All day, every day.

A Round Trip Flight Is Only $750

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So does someone want to fly to Portland to get me some breakfast from Voodoo Doughnuts? Oh cool, thanks. You're the best.

Tan Lines, Here We Come

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I could do better than that. This Charming Tan. Yup, nailed it.

It's a Squirrel Eating a Slice

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If I could switch bodies with this squirrel in a Freaky Friday like situation, I would most definitely do so right about now.

More Pablo Prigioni Half Time Interviews, Please


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God bless Pablocia. New York Knicks 102, Milwaukee Bucks whatever.

JAMS: Action Bronson - Rare Chandeliers



Gif-able album covers and drops about the rarest of chandeliers, this is dope.

Dikembe Mutumbo is Saving the World

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So this is a thing. God bless you, Old Spice.

"Sit On It "- Fonzie/Ronald McDonald

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We sit on hamburgers and eat chairs.

Tis The Season For Grilled Cheese Ornaments

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Next to the Patrick Ewing ornament I just ordered, this Grilled Cheese one is the must have "Christmas Tree Ornament" of 2012.

"All I Want Is To Pet All Of The Dogs" Is the New "A Lannister Always Pays His Debts"

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Someone has a new family credo.

Robots & Whiskey

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Robots and whiskey, these are my interests. 

Goodnight Sweet Prince Fireman Ed Anzalone

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License Plate Guy, last New York "super fan" left standing. What you know about that?

Sorry Basketball But Dogs!


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Missed Knicks/Nets because I also had real life basketball games scheduled last night too, so good for BK I GUESS. Here's a picture of a real dog and a manikin dog in Am Appy hoodies becoming friends.


F.G.IV


So we deep fried a turkey at Friendsgiving IV. What'd you do this weekend? Also follow your boy on Instagram!

New York Knicks 121, Detroit Pistons Whatever

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Novie's back.

Birthday Boy Biden

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70 years of B.I.D.E.N.

Silver & Gold & Gravedigger

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Sufjan Christmas music and Monster Trucks, these are my interests. 

"Quite Frankly, This Prospect Shows Promise" - Stephen A on Young Stephen A

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Quite frankly/however/Skip Bayless.

Deep Fried Cookie Dough?

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So we're going to the Texas State Fair, right?

Internal Monologues

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Feeling like Annie Hall and/or Alvy Singer, all day, every day.

"You Can La Cirque my La Jerk" - Guy Fieri


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I know people are like "all Kate McKinnon this, Kate McKinnon that" and she's great but Bobby Moynihan FTW.

Jason "Headbandage" Kidd

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Nice bounce back by the Knicks after the Grizzlies took 'em down a notch on Friday. Also nice look, J Kidd.

GIF Monday: Glaser Gettin' Glazed

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You know how Jon Glaser is all like "you got jammed" on Parks? Well, he got "Glazed" - Grilled Chicken with melted Cheddar, Fried Egg, Caramelized Onion, Bacon, all set on a bed of Arugula between Brioche Bun with Aioli and Sriracha. Good lord.

Dog, Friend of Sting

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Just going to assume that Sting's ringtone is this.

New York Knicks 104 San Antonio Spurs Whatever


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KNICKSTAPE. Coming back in the 4th and winning on the road in San Antonio, what you know about that? Y'all should probably stop asking is this team for real.

GIF Thursday: Rarest of Chandeliers

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I don't usually download rap mix tapes based on gifs of album covers but I'll make an exception in this case.

“…But instead, he just sat in his cubicle and ate a whole thing of candy beans.

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For what it's worth, like Michael Bluth I cope with stress by eating candy beans.

Walt Jr, Flynn, Breakfast

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I can get behind this.

WATCH THIS: Santa Paws 2, The Santa Pups

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I think we have a new OAB holiday tradition. 

Do You Think Andrew Bynum Would Be Doing This If He Was Still in LA?

(via) Serious question, y'all.

Appalachian Trail Name of Local Section

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JAMS: Beach House - Wild


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When it's all said and done, the Beach House record might be the best of 2012.

Bible Nom Nom Nom

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And I thought "All Dogs Go to Heaven."

Yeah! AFLAC!


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5 and 0! Heart Sheed's antics but chill out with those threes, dude.

"I Asked Three To Stop Staring At Me" - Referee Re: Sheed


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I could watch Sheed stare down officials all day.

"Christ Returns to the NBA"

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Lunch time old Onion article link swapping. Oh you want another one? Okay, why not!

I Don't Remember Obama Promising This But I'll Watch


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You wanted that overly enthusiastic British basketball announcer to call a simulation of the Dream Team and 2012 US Olympic team in 2K13? You got it.

RoboCop, Hero/Friend


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Protect, serve, befriend.

"Spot If I Care?" - Drunk Uncle



Drunk Uncle FTW.

Star Spangled Shump


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This is glorious.



* Also mini I WANT THIS post for the Veteran's Day headbands.

* Also 4-0, whoop whoop.

International Spy or Brooklyn Nets Owner?


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So this is a thing.

Slick Willy Being All Slick

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Heart you Barack but Bill Clinton forever the GOAT.

"We're a Twizzlers Family"

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Can Jonathan Banks aka Ben's dad aka Mike Ehrmantraut just become a regular on Parks?

What's Worse? Losing an Election or Being Dunked?

(via) You could say that Election was a real slam dunk for Obama. You can definitely say that. Also I always knew he was a Jordan 11 conchord kind of guy.

GIF Friday: Swanson, Ehrmantraut, Bacon Wrapped Shrimp

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No half measures.

JAMS: Desaparecidos - What's New For Fall



Kind of a men's wear jam if there ever was one.

HOT BLOG ALERT: White People Mourning Romney

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This is what happens when you co-op "clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose" for your stupid campaign. Suck it GOP!

Fictional Breakfast Buds

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In the same vein of the Louis CK and Aubrey Plaza post from earlier today, I'd really like to see Ron Swanson and Flynn hang out too.

Marcus Camby, Center/Laugher

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Things I've missed, shots of basketball players laughing it up on the bench.

Joe Biden, Knoppe Big Deal

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Ah shit, Biden on Parks? These next four years are off to a terrific start.

What About the Guy With the Sunglasses? Is He Awesome?

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From that awesome people hanging out tumblr because as you know Louis CK and Aubrey Plaza are "awesome."

GIF Wednesday: Donald Trump, Irrelevant? Irresponsible? Or Both? Probably Both.




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Something something, you're fired. Good job, Brian Williams and good job, America for not making Donald Trump right last night.

Dirk Nowitizi, Born in the USA


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Hey, have you ever asked yourself - "what if Dirk's go to karaoke song was "Born in the USA" by Bruce Springsteen?" Yeah, me too.

JAMS: Sufjan Stevens - The Star-Spangled Banner


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If there's any day for us to listen to a Sufjan Stevens-ized version of the Star Spangled Banner, it's today. 4 more years of Barack and Roll!

I WANT THIS: S'Morrisey Pillow

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Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want (which is a pillow combining both my love for s'mores and the Smiths/Morrissey).

Really Regretting Not Writing in Sheed for President This Morning

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Really really really need this on a t shirt like stat.

King of All Baked Potatoes

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There is a food cart with just baked potatoes called "Baked Potato King?" That needs to happen!